Circle of Hope

by Shelley Crognale

Running a thrift store may seem like its all fun and games, but really its serious business. I vividly recall sitting in Rod’s office after agreeing to explore the role of managing the second Circle Thrift and admitting I was scared. With tears in my eyes, I expressed how risky it felt. Rod tried to reassure me, “It will be okay if it fails!” It wasn’t until much later that I realized that what I felt was the fear of success, not failure. What would happen to me if this thing took off?

I have been playing it safe for a long time. For as long as I can remember, actually. I don’t even know how to ride a bike, for goodness’ sake.

I think it’s all mixed up with living half of my childhood with a sometimes recovered, a sometimes recovering and an often sick mom. She was diagnosed with breast cancer when I was 13 and died when I was 23. The process of agreeing to lead Circle Thrift on Broad, though it may seem totally unrelated, has really been healing for me. Until very recently, I had this gut feeling that God just couldn’t be trusted. He seemed nice enough on the surface, how nice can a guy be when he lets your parent suffer and die? How could I believe that he would take care of me? I have two little kids and had just quit my job to spend more time with them. Saying Yes to leading the next Circle Thrift felt like a big risk to this little lady.

But the last several months I have been astonished at how God has honored my Yes. I have five responsible, fun, amazing employees who truly exude the love of God to every person who ventures down the stairs. I have Martha, a true friend and an amazing leader. She gives me tips, advice and guidance plus perspective, passion and energy. And it still blows my mind to think of the team that got this place fixed up and off the ground. There just ain’t enough vouchers to say thanks.

Last weekend, a pipe busted and the store flooded. I am talking puddles. On Monday, Martha and Dane spent a few hours shop-vac-ing the place and my cousin Jason and I gave it a good mopping later. This was a downer, but in the end a few bags of donations were all we lost. We also found out over the weekend that we are once again the recipients of a bigtime donation from the high-end and way cool store Anthropologie. Their donation to the first location netted so much money that we started to dream about the second store. And here we are.

Lately I have found myself humming the hymn, “In the Garden” (If you haven’t heard Over the Rhine’s version of it on their album, Films for Radio, you should check it out). In it, Charles Austin Miles describes a vision he had of the scene when Mary encountered the risen Lord. In 1913, Charles Austin Miles described it this way: “I read the story of the greatest morn in history. The first day of the week cometh Mary Magdalene early, while it was yet very dark, unto the sepulcher. Instantly, completely, there unfolded in my mind the scenes of the garden, where out of the mists comes a form, halting, hesitating, tearful, seeking, turning from side to side in bewildering amazement. Falteringly, bearing grief in every accent, with tear-dimmed eyes, she whispers, ‘If Thou has borne Him hence.’ He speaks, and the sound of His voice is so sweet the birds hush their singing. He said to her ‘Mary!’ Just one word and forgotten are the heartaches, the long dreary hours, all the past blotted out in His presence.”

I have been in the dark, in the mist and felt all those things: halting, hesitating, seeking, bewildered, faltering, amazed. It took a long time to hear, but I feel like Jesus has spoken my name. And I know that I am His own.