Circle of Hope

During my senior year of high school in Bucks County, I felt like I was being called to go to school in Philadelphia and pursue my passion for writing and following what was going on in the world. So I went to Temple University for journalism.

During my years at Temple, I had spent most of my time covering sports for Temple’s student newspaper. Somewhere in the past year or so, I felt called to branch outside of sports and to write about news, Philadelphia, politics and the local communities surrounding Temple—things that I cared a lot about.

And now I’m waiting for something else.

I just graduated from Temple last week and am now faced with the daunting task of finding my first real job.

Philadelphia is everything I had ever hoped for in a city and to have the chance to write about the news here is my dream. I care a lot about the city and am very interested in writing about things that are important to the people who live here.

I am trying hard to stay here in Philadelphia. I’m part of a wonderful community here at Circle and I feel closer to God now than I ever have been. My family and friends are all here, too. I feel so compelled to stay here, yet I feel like the outside world and the demands of my chosen career are telling me the opposite.

Since Philadelphia is in the Top 5 media markets, it is hard for me to find a secure job here in what I want to do. I’ve applied and interviewed at places that are certainly not close enough to commute from Philly. I went into one job interview last week in Central Pennsylvania with the premonition that I was going to hate it. I actually really liked it and could see myself working there and enjoying the job.

I realize I am going to have to make sacrifices for a job, but I’m not sure if I can sacrifice leaving Philadelphia. I was brought up to think that making money is not the most important thing in life and that being close to loved ones and doing a job you enjoy and love are more important.

I guess at this point in my life, I expected that God would be calling me to be doing something specific, somewhere specific. And now that I’m at the point where I have to start making some big decisions, I feel stressed and burdened by the choices I have to make.

After the interview yesterday, I called my dad and he was surprised when I told him I could actually picture myself working there. A couple of weeks ago, he told me that God would be with me no matter where I lived and worked. It seems obvious, but at the time, I had a temporary brain malfunction and had forgotten that simple, but true concept.

Even still, I am continuing to struggle with the idea of not feeling called to be anywhere. I know I am called to do something, but I am struggling with where I need to be to do it. Does it matter where I use my talents?

I have been trying to pray about it lately and that has cleared my mind. At this point, I’m just praying and trying to leave it up to God.