I’ve been advised in the past to tend to the new life God is growing in me. To learn how to do this I’ve paid attention to instances of “tending.” The last nine months, though, my pregnancy gave me the opportunity to learn about the “new life” part. What I’ve learned has astounded me. New life, apparently, is grown and birthed by God and not by me. This sounds obvious, but it’s shocking to find it is true with something so intimate as my own pregnancy. Here I’d thought “tending” was about “doing” – digging holes, planting seeds, watering, pulling weeds . . . but with pregnancy and birth “tending” becomes markedly different: it is about waiting and then about following.
First the waiting part: Any woman who has suspected pregnancy knows about the waiting – waiting to find out if the new life has even begun. Then we wait for other evidence – a heartbeat, a “baby bump.” All this waiting culminates in the end wait: waiting for birth. I thought this baby would come sooner than he did. I was really expecting him. I was really frustrated. While I was obsessed with this “waiting” theme my cell was reading I John and I become interested in John’s idea of “abiding” in Christ. Doing some rudimentary research I stumbled upon the connection that “abiding” means something akin to “tarrying” – waiting in Christ. Waiting for Christ. Waiting in Christ for new life.
Next the following part: A woman in labor does not get to control the labor. We have to follow it. Those infamous contractions we experience are completely out of our control. Our body has a job: to open up the cervix so that the baby can descend. That opening is done by my womb but I myself don’t get to control the opening. My job is to stay loose, to stay relaxed, to follow the contractions to their end. Even when it was time for me to push (thank goodness – finally some control over the process!) I was still told to follow. The midwife gave me very, very specific instructions (chin down, tiny push, breathe through this contraction, etc.) and my job was to follow. This was my body, my baby, my “new life” experience but the work given to me was to slow down, to listen, and to follow.
So those are my two thoughts: wait and follow. You’ve probably thought them yourself before but since they’re particularly visceral for me this week, I wanted to share. I’m also including a picture of Brendan just because the waiting and the following (not to mention the pain) were totally worth it – he is wonderful.



